There once was a singer named Elton
who had the girls hearts all a’meltin’.
But soon they discovered
he was a man lover;
twas dicks he’d rather be feltin’.

There once was a Vulcan named Spock
Who tried stroking his monstrous cock
With lust went berserk
And beseeched Captain Kirk,
“Bend over, this shuttle must dock!”

There once was a queer from Khartoum

Who took a lesbian up to his room.

They spent the whole night

In a hell of a fight

Over who should do what, and to whom!

There lay two gay men in the snow

And those two men commenced to blow

As it got colder

The men got bolder

To get the cinders in their campfire to glow

There was a young tart from Southend,
Who tried lesbian sex with her friend;
With a moan and a grunt,
She licked her mates cunt;
And loved the experience no end.

There once was a queer from Rangoon
who invited a lesbian up to his room
they did argue and fight
all thru the night
as to who would do what to whom