There was a hooker from Honchu
Who on peckers and penises did chew.
Said a friend, “Why don’t you
Have them stick it to you,
Then you could enjoy the sex too.”

“For Christmas”, she said with a tingle
“I’d love a gift cunnilingual!”
‘Twas with joy and surprise
She found twixt her thighs
The tongue of jolly Kris Kringle!

There once was a man from New York
Who asked, “Hun, would you please suck my dork?”
“I don’t like the taste”
He cried, “What a waste!
My wife says it tastes just like pork”

She asked him “Please don’t ever quit,”
As he sucked on her supple left tit,
And with talented mouth,
He headed down south,
And finished her lickety split.

I heard that she would never say no
Just 10 bucks for a blow.
But when down on her knees
I said, “Oh baby please
Move up, you’re too low, that’s my toe!”

A young man named Marty O’Doul

Found a red ring on his tool.

He went to the clinic,

Said the doctor, a cynic,

Wash it off, its only lipstick, you fool!

Hickory Dickory Dock
The tongue ran up the cock.
The man did smile.
It had been quite a while.
And his cock was as hard as a rock!