Daily Dirty Limerick » Uncategorized

Once there was a man from Boston

tiki god — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 19:21:39 +0000

Once there was a man from Boston
Who took a ride in his Austin
He had room for his ass
a gallon of gas
but his balls hung out and he lost them.

There once was a barmaid named Gale

tiki god — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 19:20:24 +0000

There once was a barmaid named Gale
On whose breasts was the menu for ale
But since she was kind
For the sake of the blind
On her ass it was printed in Braille.

A hard-headed cabby named Peter

tiki god — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 19:20:08 +0000

A hard-headed cabby named Peter
Was asked by a fare if he’d eat her.
He said, “It’s not free.
I will only agree
To go down while I’m running the meter.”

Goldilocks has lots of guys

tiki god — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 19:19:50 +0000

Goldilocks has lots of guys
Pinnochio’s one, I’m advised!
She sits on the puppet
And sticks his nose right up it
And makes the poor fellow tell lies!

Ode to Janie and Joe

peralta1 — Tue, 27 Jul 2010 22:18:48 +0000

There once was a chick from Apache Junction

Whose herpes was so bad she could hardly function

Her boyfriend was Joe

And he called her a ho’

When he learned of his own infection.

there was a young man from Bude

Disco — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 01:27:29 +0000

there was a young man from Bude

stood fingering his girl while they queued

a man in the front sniffed and said cunt

just like that right out loud, fucking rude

There was a young lady of Clewer

tiki god — Wed, 11 Jul 2007 19:18:19 +0000

There was a young lady of Clewer
Who was riding a bike, and it threw her.
A man saw her there
With her legs in the air,
And seized the occasion to screw her.

There was a young fellow named Skinner

tiki god — Tue, 10 Jul 2007 19:18:03 +0000

There was a young fellow named Skinner
Who took a young lady to dinner.
At a quarter to nine
They sat down to dine;
And at a quarter to ten it was in her.

My back aches, my pussy is sore

tiki god — Fri, 06 Jul 2007 19:16:03 +0000

My back aches, my pussy is sore;
I simply can’t fuck any more;
I’m covered with sweat,
And you haven’t come yet,
And my God, it’s a quarter to four!

There once was a hacker named Ken

tiki god — Wed, 04 Jul 2007 19:15:27 +0000

There once was a hacker named Ken
Who inherited truckloads of Yen
So he built him some chicks
Of silicon chips
And hasn’t been heard from since then.