Sweet Mary wanted to stay celibate

for a man with wealth and intelligence

She ran from the alter

For balls like Gibraltar

On a dimwit hung like an elephant

There was a girl from Arabia

A devout Muslim, Mohammed was her savior

To save her from sin

The surgeon cut in

And removed every bit of her labia.

They switched to the topic of sex,
which left them both quickly perplexed
’cause she was still virgin,
and and he stunk like sturgeon,
and both were as old as a t-rex.