His car had maxed out his speed
So he got stopped for his deed
During the infraction
He jumped into action
And saved him from choking on weed
Favorite This!Keep it Dirty!
His car had maxed out his speed
So he got stopped for his deed
During the infraction
He jumped into action
And saved him from choking on weed
Favorite This!In Europe, tensions did boil
So lawyers began to toil
Two chocolate hares
‘Swhat caused the affairs
And all of it over gold foil
Favorite This!Twitter really tried to stay cool
By giving their users a new tool
It wasn’t desired
And Promptly backfired
If you use it you’re a fucking fool
Favorite This!She needed exposure, hands-on
So he gave her an apron to don
Fifteen years she stayed
Then offered a trade
A buck for the whole damn salon
Favorite This!Customs located a stash
Of eyelash after eyelash
But the FDA
Did have their say
And think they could cause quite a rash
Favorite This!Most birds gather pebbles and sticks
And munch on some worms or some ticks
But before the flock split
They fucked up her shit
Who knew condors could be such dicks
Favorite This!In Florida, the pigeons did roam
Looking for their home sweet home
Landed on the highway
Decided they’re stray
Now eating trash and styrofoam
Favorite This!They thought they were quite clever folk
But now they’re just in jail and broke
They surely paid
For the cake they made
Their sweet treat was actually coke
Favorite This!A man from Wyoming got high
On a substance he wanted to try
Then he called the cops
So they sent in their ops
Now to meth, he’ll have to say “bye”
Favorite This!For mayor, he wanted their pick
So on stage, he gave his shtick
But soon interrupted
As chaos erupted
Because of a drone with a dick
Favorite This!