Tag: Vaginas and Vulva

There once was a girl from Peru
Who said she had nothing to do
She sat on some stairs
And counted cunt hairs
Four thousand, six hundred and two

With a blowtorch he set out to melt,
His loved one’s iron chastity belt.
What dampened his yearning,
Was pubic hair burning,
And he lost the desire he felt.

In convertibles she was quite brash,
When she put her feet up on the dash.
A trucker drove by,
Her bare crotch caught his eye,
And four people were injured in the crash.

She had sat in a pretty green patch,
But now found herself having to scratch.
Poison ivy she’s got,
And she’s itching a lot,
Right down there and real close to her snatch.

There was a bleached blond named Dolores
Who had an unusual clitoris
It’s location remote
Was deep in her throat
Where she douched with a touch of Lavoris!

There Once Was A Girl From Shrilanka
Whose Cunt Was As Big As A Tanker
You Could Go For A Swim
In The Depths Of Her Quim
And You Needed A Lamppost To Wank Her

Said a boy to a girl from Beirut,
“I’ve had none better looking than you.
But don’t be quick to boast
For your cunt’s dry as toast
And it smells like an old dirty shoe.”

There once was a woman named Schott
Who ate only pig shit and snot
When she ran out of these,
She lived on the cheese
That grew in the folds of her twat

There was a young whore from kaloo
Who filled her vagina with glue.
She said with a grin,
“If they pay to get in,
They can pay to get out again too!”

I once banged this girl named Marge
And her twat really was quite large
All alone around ten,
I slipped and fell in
But I climbed out with ten marines and my sarge

There was a young fellow from Florida,
Who liked a friend’s wife, so he borrowed her.
When they got into bed,
He cried, “God strike me dead,
This isn’t a cunt, it’s a corridor!”

There once was a queen from Bulgariar
whose bush grew hairier and hairier
a prince from Peru
came up for a screw
and had too hunt for her cunt with a terrier.

Once a young woman named Alice
Used a dynamite stick for a phallus.
They found her vagina
In North Carolina,
And part of her anus in Dallas.

There once was a lady named Dot
Who lived off of pigshit and snot.
When she ran out of these
She ate the green cheese
That she grew on the sides of her twat.

There was a young lady from China
Who mistook for her mouth, her vagina
Her clitoris huge
she covered with rouge
And lipsticked her labia minor

There was an old hooker named Chariff,
Who let out a monstrous queef.
With the grace of a swan,
She said to her John,
“Does anyone else smell roast beef?”

There once was a lady named Lucky,
Who used dynamite to give herself fucky.
They found her vagina
in North Carolina,
And one of her tits in Kentucky.

There once was girl from DeVries,
Who had pussy hair down to her knees,
It was fine to shine brass,
Or for wiping her ass,
And the crabs used it for a trapeze.

There once was a woman from china
who had a magnificent vagina
so sweet, never sour
the thing had the power
to make men the dinner, and the diner

There once was a bitch on the streets
who said I don’t like to eat
so if I down an ounce more
as a twenty buck whore
it’s protein without all the meat

As a girl I thought it was funny
to dress up as a playboy bunny
my dad was perplexed
that I knew about sex
hence his jackoffs were no longer sunny

There once was a hooker named Sue,
Who filled her vagina with glue,
As she said with a grin,
If they’ll pay to get in,
Then they’ll pay to get out of it too!

There was a young lady from China,
Who had an enormous vagina,
And when she was dead,
They painted it red,
And used it for docking a liner.

there once was a girl from Peru
who had nothing much better to do
so she sat on the stairs
and counted cunt hairs
four thousand three hundred two!

There once was a girl from Peru
who had nothing much better to do
so she sat on the stairs
and counted cunt hairs
four thousand three hundred two

Said a woman with open delight,
“My pubic hair’s perfectly white.
I admit there’s a glare,
But the fellows don’t care.
They locate it more quickly at night.”

There was a young harlot from Kew
Who filled her vagina with glue.
She said with a grin,
“If they pay to get in,
They’ll pay to get out of it, too.”