This man was headed to a cell
But cops saw that he wasn’t well
Saw something in the man
Through the body scan
They found a shotgun shell


Keep it Dirty!
This man was headed to a cell
But cops saw that he wasn’t well
Saw something in the man
Through the body scan
They found a shotgun shell
Some collectors, they choose to own
Comic books, old pornos, or cologne
Some of these buyer’s
Collection requires
Guns and things used by Capone
A Munich man was flying back
Traveling with only his rucksack
Was it just dumb luck,
Or’s he a dim fuck?
‘Cause it looked like he planned to attack
With the cat, she was having some fun
Using the laser pointer on a gun
Things soon went awry
Her friend shot in the thigh
Just about a foot of his bun
He was learning to shoot chipmunks dead
But this little shot, he misread
They’ll need a band-aid
Since it ricocheted
And shot his uncle in the head
The good people of #SanJose
— OutonaLimericks (formerly POTUSLimericks) (@trumplimericks2) May 27, 2021
Can give thanks to the @NRA
For the work that they’ve done
To make sure that a gun
Would make widows and orphans today#GunReformNow @Mick_Limerick @Limericking @Libericks @LimeriTweets @GodOfLimericks @Limerick_News @LouC17 @smotus https://t.co/QVKJL6DQYj
In the dirt, it was buried and snug
But a mysterious thing they undug
They were afraid
It was a grenade
But turned out to be a butt plug
With a gun, he walked into the foyer
“It’s a fake!” said his old employer
He tried to play cool
But is truly a fool
As he now wants to be his own lawyer
We all do dumb shit when we’re drunk
Like gambling or trying to dunk
But this guy stole a sword
Then his guilt, he ignored
40 years ‘fore he returned it, the punk
His actions, unruly and sus
The chaos, it caused quite a fuss
This asshole should have known
That in jail he’d be thrown
For shooting a flamethrower off of a bus