Keep it Dirty!
In Louisiana’s bayou so deep,
Extremists, in faith, take a leap.
Forcing kids to read,
Their beliefs, a creed,
Ignoring the law’s sacred keep.
With church and state meant to be parted,
Their actions leave many dishearted.
In textbooks, they preach,
Beyond their own reach,
Their agenda, the law has thwarted.
Yet still, they persist in their quest,
Ignoring what’s right, what’s best.
But the law stands firm,
Their zeal they must squirm,
For freedom demands this be addressed.
People just want to have hope
Some get it from booze or from dope
What does it for me
Is this pic, you see
Of Spider-man and the Pope
The sidewalk’s where these assholes perch
In mailboxes, they do their search
Just looking for cash
To add to their stash
What’s the punishment for stealing from church?
There was a kind pastor I knew,
Who kept a large cat in a pew.
There he taught it each week
A new letter of Greek,
But it never got further than mu.
There was a young Rabbi from peru,
Who was vainly attempting to screw,
His wife said “Oi vey”,
If you keep up this way,
The Messiah will come before you do.
I know a tall Sunday school teacher,
Who wanted to screw the short preacher.
She flashed him some thigh,
But her pussy seemed high,
So he stood on a chair just to reach her.
An indiscrete deacon named Fred,
Coaxed the minister’s wife into bed.
She seductively posed,
With her blessings exposed,
Thank God for this heavenly spread.
In the check out at the food store
a nun was advising the poor:
“Hey you up in front!
That’s too many items you cunt!
And they won’t take food stamps for beer ya dumb whore.”
There once was a Jew from Peru
who was vainly attempting to screw.
His wife screamed “oy vey,
if you keep up this way,
The Messiah will come before you.”
There was a girl from Arabia
A devout Muslim, Mohammed was her savior
To save her from sin
The surgeon cut in
And removed every bit of her labia.
“You, choirboy!” ordered the pastor
“Bend over the pew for your Master!”
He said with a moan
As he slipped him a bone.
“Now just wag your tail a bit faster!”
A lascivious monk from Dundee
Buggered a nun in a tree
While deep in her ass
He chanted High Mass
And even the Pope came to see
They wanted to put Bill in jail
For using his house to chase tail
But the judge wasn’t fooled
Saw no crime so he ruled:
“Not guilty! He didn’t inhale.”
A lovely young bride name of Kylie
Said, “Husband, I don’t rate you highly.
I have to confess
I prefer the caress
And the fucking of Father O’Reilly.”
There once was a monk from Kerplunks
Whose body was that of a hunk’s
The nuns all went woozy
when he stepped into the jacuzzi
For the monk had forgotten his trunks.
There once was a man from Siberia
Whose morals were really inferior
He did to a nun,
What he shouldn’t have done
And now she’s a mother superior
There once was an abbot of Brittany
Who chanted this desolate litany:
“If Christ is the Source
Of Divine Intercourse,
Then how come I don’t ever gitany?”
There once was an altar boy from Crewe,
Who remarked as the vicar withdrew,
“The Bishop was quicker,
And thicker and slicker,
And two inches longer than you.”
In chapel the sight of young May
Caused young Timothy trouser affray
And a sticky wet palm
At the end of the psalm
When the minister said “Come, Let us spray.”