This poor pup fell into a crack
Where food and water did lack
Then five days passed
Now’s free at last
Safe at home now, she is back
Some folks from Kingsley are quite pissed
Some folks from Kingsley are quite pissed
As they’re shouting and shaking their fist
Hubbell kept scoring
Which got the crowd roaring
They sucked, how could he resist?
A Munich man was flying back
A Munich man was flying back
Traveling with only his rucksack
Was it just dumb luck,
Or’s he a dim fuck?
‘Cause it looked like he planned to attack
In the small town of Krefeld
In the small town of Krefeld
And ostrich chick is being held
They have no clue
If it fled the zoo
Or from someone’s house was expelled
Some people are born trans or gay
Some people are born trans or gay
This school showed that is okay
They waved their pride flag
As they dressed in drag
Then made the field into a runway
This Liberian teen is the man
This Liberian teen is the man
Doing something not everyone can
Out driving one day
He found 50k
Returning it was just part of his plan
Some people like baking cakes
Some people like baking cakes
Or fixing car tires and brakes
This dude from LV
Gets his own glee
By caring for 30 fucking snakes
An attraction in London was new
An attraction in London was new
That claimed to have a great view
But by the time
They finished their climb
Most thought the attraction was poo
Lost his stash and he had to mourn
Lost his stash and he had to mourn
“I’ll get you for this” he had sworn
His parents dumped it
And he lost his shit
Thirty thousand for all of that porn
North Korea posed for a pic
North Korea posed for a pic
Most soldiers really looked slick
One man to the side
He just couldn’t hide
His jumpsuit showed clearly, his dick