Something was wrong with their dryer
A repairman, they decided to hire
So he took a look
And found in the nook
A snake with a mouthful of wire
The shoppers have begun to admit
The shoppers have begun to admit
Crimes they’ve seen birds commit
As they head to their cars
They swoop from the stars
And the ravens are taking their shit
They’ve lived in their house for year
They’ve lived in their house for year
And wanted others to share in their cheer
To their neighbors, they write
After deciding to invite
Them all over for refreshing free beer
This week at the San Diego zoo
This week at the San Diego zoo
A man had a brain made of poo
This stupid fuck
Really tried his luck
As the elephants, he tried to pursue
This asshole is really a twit
This asshole is really a twit
Stealing money by pulling some skit
He’s done most of his time
But just couldn’t quit crime
So enjoy some more prison, ya shit
It’s so hard just being a teen,
It’s so hard just being a teen,
Doing school and keeping your room clean,
But in a strive for perfection,
They rigged the election
All so she could be homecoming queen
The fire began burning and smoke
The fire began burning and smoke
Poured out, finding people to choke
So this little girl
Gave the mattress a hurl
And jumped from the third floor, no joke
They promised to meet in a field
They promised to meet in a field
Equipped with a sword and a shield
Many Joshes contended
But soon the fight ended
So the fate of the best Josh was sealed
With a gun, he walked into the foyer
With a gun, he walked into the foyer
“It’s a fake!” said his old employer
He tried to play cool
But is truly a fool
As he now wants to be his own lawyer
A cookie is flying through space
A cookie is flying through space
But not one you’d put in your face
Not just some space junk
A planetary chunk
From truly an alien place