This week on our capitol hill,
More shit they are trying to shill
‘Stead of giving us money
They thought it be funny
To read a 600 page bill
Bernie Sander’s is not one for glitz
Bernie Sander’s is not one for glitz
Or spending weekends staying at the Ritz
Some may think he’s extreme
But a good guy, it would seem
He raised money selling his funny mitts
Do you remember that one dude?
Do you remember that one dude?
His TikTok, many times has been viewed
He drank Ocean Spray
While he cruised the highway
Now his signed bottle, a museum, will include
We’ve been stuck inside for so long
We’ve been stuck inside for so long,
With our beer, our games, and our bong,
So we tried something new
Just to make it through
We be singin’ that old sailor song
Some people rock while others suck
Some people rock while others suck
Some are as dumb as an inbred duck
This dude was interferring,
With radio waves, commandeering,
He could’ve killed someone, the raging dumb fuck
On Thursday, our buddy Teddy Cruz
On Thursday, our buddy Teddy Cruz
Was having a case of the blues
To the airport, he rolled
To get away from the cold
Now his people, he’ll have to shmooze
NASA’s rover just landed on Mars
NASA’s rover just landed on Mars
Spending months floating through the stars
“Dare Mighty Things”
Written in the chute’s rings
Maybe one day we’ll make that world ours
This douche, he had stolen a ride
This douche, he had stolen a ride
But found a child sitting inside
This he could not ignore
And drove back to the store
Then the mother, he decided to chide
The puffins are getting their wish
The puffins are getting their wish
Herrings’ll lose space on our dish
As the NOAA
Came out to say
“For the puffins, save some of the fish”
Florida men are truly unique
Florida men are truly unique
This one decided to go for a streak
He didn’t stop there
Balls out, his ass bare
Stole the cop car, with havoc to wreak