You’d hope that people would be wiser
But some need a full-time advisor
If to yellowstone yer goin’
It might be worth knowin’
Don’t try and cook dinner in the geyser
Quite the old coin found in Maine
Quite the old coin found in Maine
Such luck may not come again
But in metal detecting
There’s little connecting
Which makes dating all the more plain
Remember those assholes with guns?
Remember those assholes with guns?
The pricks on their lawn, yeah those ones
Now they’re looking to sue
For the attention they drew
But they deserve all the looks and the shuns
The parents of fourteen great sons
The parents of fourteen great sons
Her oven so active with buns
As rare as a pearl
They had a girl
So the fuckin’ there had to been tons
The people voted him out by the legions
The people voted him out by the legions
We did it all for most the same reasons
We knew they were dense
But this fuck up’s immense
What clown books the wrong Four Seasons?
The break in was perfect, textbook
The break in was perfect, textbook
Not cash but a reptile they took
Their secret was blown
‘Cause they shoulda known
No one else sells lizards on Facebook
On the lawn, the robot should stay
On the lawn, the robot should stay
Yet the thief did not see it this way
As the droid phoned his master
He couldn’t been faster
To scare the ol’ dickhead away
Fuck Donald Trump
Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck You
Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck You Times Two
Fuck Donald Trump
Right In His Rump
Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck You
They came to the jail, by will or by warrant
They came to the jail, by will or by warrant
Some crimes were mild while others, abhorrent
But these jailers lacked empathy,
Even the Devil’d have sympathy
‘Cause that much “Baby Shark’ is just torment
They say to learn from others mistakes
They say to learn from others mistakes
It will surely save you headaches
What he thought was a fuck up
Soon turned his luck up
Cause it won him two mil in sweepstakes