There was a young lady of Bude
Who went for a swim in the nude
But a man came along
And unless I am wrong
YOU thought the last line would be RUDE.
.
(Last line to be recited in disapproving voice)
Cawnpore/Kanpur
There once were two men of Cawnpore
Who buggered and fucked the same whore
But the partition split
and the spunk and the shit
Fell out in great lumps on the floor.
…filthiest I know
There was a young man from Lainus
There was a young man from Lainus
Who emitted an odor quite heinous
As people passed by
Many started to cry
Turns out there’s a leak in his anus
There once was a woman named Ann
There once was a woman named Ann
Who was said to be quite like a man.
When nature did call,
She ran down the hall,
And went to the gentleman’s can.
“How could you”, said Joe to his mother
“How could you”, said Joe to his mother,
“Cavort in your bed with another?”
“Oh promise me lad
That you won’t tell your dad
If I screw you as good as your brother.
There once was a fellow named Mark
There once was a fellow named Mark
who spread a girls legs in the dark
He said “Now by thunder
it’s a natural wonder
I declare this a National Park.”
An architect fellow named Yoric
An architect fellow named Yoric
Could, when feeling euphoric,
Display for selection
Three kinds of erection
Corinthian, ionic, and doric.
I’m told of a Bishop of Birmingham
I’m told of a Bishop of Birmingham,
Who buggered young boys while confirming them,
To roars of applause,
He tore down their drawers,
And pumped the Episcable sperm in ’em.
I know of a horny boy Matt
I know of a horny boy Matt
Who played with a vampire bat
With his dick in his hand
His voice did command
“Try sucking the blood out of that!”
there once was a genie
there once was a genie
with a ten foot weenie
so he showed it to the lady next door,
she thought it was a snake
and cut it with a rake
and now its only five-foot-four