There once was a plumber from Leigh,
Who was plumbing his maid by the sea,
Said she, “Please stop plumbing,
I think someone’s coming!”
Said he, “Yes I know love, it’s me.”

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OP’s mom is such a low catch
There once was a kid named Billy
Quite the old coin found in Maine
There once was a man from Nantucket,
Sleepy Hollow