Remember that Little Miss Muffet
The one with the tits and the tuffet?
I gave her my largest
Havana cigar just
To see if she’d puff it or stuff it.

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There was a young Lady called tart
That wily old pervert St. Nick
From Home Depot, he stole quite a lot
Young Caroline acts like a prude
His boredom he was tryin’ to fix