Old Charlie, a jolly old bloke
Made love to a cow as a joke
He found pleasure divine
With this friendly bovine
Now they call him the old cowpoke!
I don’t mean to tarnish your cheer
I don’t mean to tarnish your cheer
But old Santa Claus is a big queer!
He fondles the elves,
Who pleasure themselves
With a bugger up old Santa’s rear!
Ginger was feeling quite gruff
Ginger was feeling quite gruff
Till he placed his head in her muff
Then she purred like a kitty
When his tongue hit her clitty
Saying, “I just can’t get enough!”
Ginger from County of Dade
Ginger from County of Dade
Said, “I think it’s time I got laid.”
“My vibrator can tingle
But it’s not cunnilingual”
And that’s how orgasms are made.”
There was a bleached blond named Dolores
There was a bleached blond named Dolores
Who had an unusual clitoris
It’s location remote
Was deep in her throat
Where she douched with a touch of Lavoris!
To Stan, Ginger whined and then sighed
To Stan, Ginger whined and then sighed
Her vibrator battery died
She got off instead
With ten minutes of head,
Then she gave Stan’s old willie a ride!
Said a horny young girl from Milpitas
Said a horny young girl from Milpitas,
“My favorite sport is coitus.”
But a fullback from State
Made her period late,
And now she has athlete’s fetus.
There once was pervert named Manny
There once was pervert named Manny
who stuck his long prick up his fanny.
Oh! What’s this shouting about?
Seems he can’t get it out.
He can’t shit, he can’t piss. It’s uncanny!
Once there was a man from Boston
Once there was a man from Boston
Who took a ride in his Austin
He had room for his ass
a gallon of gas
but his balls hung out and he lost them.
There once was a barmaid named Gale
There once was a barmaid named Gale
On whose breasts was the menu for ale
But since she was kind
For the sake of the blind
On her ass it was printed in Braille.