She thought she bought some tampons from

There once was a vampire called Mabel,

There once was a vampire called Mabel,
With periods exceedingly stable,
Each night at full moon,
She’d sit down with a spoon,
And drink herself under the table.

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We all know that tampons are spongy

We all know that tampons are spongy
And often times get rather grungy
But why they have strings
Among other things
Is so that the crabs can all bungee.

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There once was a vampress named Mable

There once was a vampress named Mable
Whose periods were very unstable
By the light of the moon,
She’d take out a spoon
And drink herself under the table

For money, and something to clamp on

For money, and something to clamp on
Young Suzi inserted a tampon.
She diddled her cunt
‘Til she came with grunt
And then sold it still fresh with her damp on.

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