Ginger from County of Dade
Said, “I think it’s time I got laid.”
“My vibrator can tingle
But it’s not cunnilingual”
And that’s how orgasms are made.”
There was a bleached blond named Dolores
There was a bleached blond named Dolores
Who had an unusual clitoris
It’s location remote
Was deep in her throat
Where she douched with a touch of Lavoris!
To Stan, Ginger whined and then sighed
To Stan, Ginger whined and then sighed
Her vibrator battery died
She got off instead
With ten minutes of head,
Then she gave Stan’s old willie a ride!
Said a horny young girl from Milpitas
Said a horny young girl from Milpitas,
“My favorite sport is coitus.”
But a fullback from State
Made her period late,
And now she has athlete’s fetus.
There once was pervert named Manny
There once was pervert named Manny
who stuck his long prick up his fanny.
Oh! What’s this shouting about?
Seems he can’t get it out.
He can’t shit, he can’t piss. It’s uncanny!
Once there was a man from Boston
Once there was a man from Boston
Who took a ride in his Austin
He had room for his ass
a gallon of gas
but his balls hung out and he lost them.
There once was a barmaid named Gale
There once was a barmaid named Gale
On whose breasts was the menu for ale
But since she was kind
For the sake of the blind
On her ass it was printed in Braille.
A hard-headed cabby named Peter
A hard-headed cabby named Peter
Was asked by a fare if he’d eat her.
He said, “It’s not free.
I will only agree
To go down while I’m running the meter.”
Goldilocks has lots of guys
Goldilocks has lots of guys
Pinnochio’s one, I’m advised!
She sits on the puppet
And sticks his nose right up it
And makes the poor fellow tell lies!
Ode to Janie and Joe
There once was a chick from Apache Junction
Whose herpes was so bad she could hardly function
Her boyfriend was Joe
And he called her a ho’
When he learned of his own infection.
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