There once was a girl named Savannah

There once was a girl named Savannah
Who smoked cock like she’s from Havana
Her cunt was so snug
’twas like getting a hug
and her tits were like peaks in Montana.

The pastor and the cat

There was a kind pastor I knew,

Who kept a large cat in a pew.

There he taught it each week

A new letter of Greek,

But it never got further than mu.

Australian Classic

While pig shooting out on the bogan

I came across a dirty great big pig grogan

It was long brown and thin

With leathery skin

It looked like fucking Paul Hogan

The man from Overton

A South English Overton man
Embarked on a dastardly plan
He planted his tackle
In a poor duck’s cloacal
And pounded its anus to sand

The woman from the Azores

There once was a a girl from the Azores
Whose gash was covered in sores
All the dogs in the street
They would eat the green meat
That hung in festoons from her drawers

There once was a lady from Ealing

There once was a lady from Ealing
Who had an incredible feeling
She lay on her back
Opened her crack
And pissed up all over the ceiling

Fromage

I frequently feel kind of sleazy

And oily and filthy and greasy

I wank and eat Cheetos

And Nacho Doritos

I guess that I’m easy for cheesy.

Dat booty

There once was a girl from Nantucket,
Who’s ass was the shape of a bucket,
Although very misshapen,
Dat booty be shaken,
And I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t fuck it

I once met a girl who was hot

I once met a girl who was hot,
who wanted a place she could squat.
I thought it was weird,
that she had a beard,
and stood up when she used the pot.

There Once Was A Man Called Keith

There Once Was A Man Called Keith

Who Circumcised Kids With His Teeth

It Wasn’t For Pleasure Or Sexual Leisure

But To Get To The Cheese Underneath