There was a young man from the Clyde
Who fell down a sewer and died
Next day his brother,
Fell down another
And now they’re interred side by side.
There once was a man from Berlin
There once was a man from Berlin
Whose pecker hung down to his shin.
When a lady named Gert
Started lifting her skirt,
His prick rose with a thump to his chin.
The nipples of Sarah Strong
The nipples of Sarah Strong,
When excited, are twelve inches long.
This embarrassed her lover
Who was pained to discover
She expected no less of his dong.
There once was a girl from Decatur
There once was a girl from Decatur
Who got laid by a big alligator.
Now, nobody knew
The result of that screw,
Because after he laid her, he ate her.
There once was a girl from Mitchen
There once was a girl from Mitchen
Who was scratching her twat in the kitchen.
Her mother said, “Rose,
you’ve got crabs I suppose.”
She said, “Yes and those fuckers are ‘itchin!”
An exotic young lady named Suki
An exotic young lady named Suki,
Once danced in a troupe of kabuki,
When asked for a fuck,
She said, “Solly, no luck
See here: looky looky, no nuki “
A mortician who practiced in Fife
A mortician who practiced in Fife
Made love to the corpse of his wife.
“How could I know, Judge?
She was cold, dinna budge,
Just the same as she acted in life.”
I know a tall Sunday school teacher
I know a tall Sunday school teacher,
Who wanted to screw the short preacher.
She flashed him some thigh,
But her pussy seemed high,
So he stood on a chair just to reach her.
A strange young fellow from Leeds
A strange young fellow from Leeds
Rashly swallowed a package of seeds.
Great tufts of fine grass
Sprouted out of his ass
And his balls were covered with weeds.
There once was a man from Cheyenne
There once was a man from Cheyenne
Of women, he was a fan
But they thought “Damn he’s fat!”
“I’m not touching that!”
So he had to rely on his hand.