There was a man from Ka-bot
That lived on his boogers and snot
When he couldn’t have these
He lived on the cheese,
That grew on his grungy old cock!
Hickory Dickory Dock
Hickory Dickory Dock
The tongue ran up the cock.
The man did smile.
It had been quite a while.
And his cock was as hard as a rock!
Shirley Brown thought it a fable
Shirley Brown thought it a fable
That everyone must have a navel,
For she had a yard
Of unbilical cord
She kept hidden beneath the table.
Young lady from Nizes
There was a young lady from Nizes
Who had tits of two different sizes.
One was so small,
It was nothing at all,
But the other was quite large, and won prizes!
The Lass Named Katrina
Did you ever see the lass named Katrina?
She’s frightening, if you ever seen her
When she started to blow
The smart people did go
The rest stayed in the Superdome arena
An accident really uncanny
An accident really uncanny,
Befell an unfortunate granny.
She sat down in a chair
While her false teeth were there,
And bit herself right in the fanny!
While Titian was mixing rose madder,
While Titian was mixing rose madder,
his model was posed on a ladder.
Her position to Titian
suggested fruition.
So he mounted the ladder and had her.
There once was a man named McSweeny
There once was a man named McSweeny
Who spilled some gin on his weenie
Just to be Couth
He added some Vermouth
And slipped his chick a Martini!
Bigamy, they say, is a vice
Bigamy, they say, is a vice,
And more than one spouse is not nice,
But one is a bore,
I’d prefer three or four,
And the plural of spouse is spice?
There once was a Jew from Peru
There once was a Jew from Peru
who was vainly attempting to screw.
His wife screamed “oy vey,
if you keep up this way,
The Messiah will come before you.”