A mathematician named Hall
had a hexadronical ball
the cube of its weight
times his pecker plus eight
is his number, give him a call
Favorite This! A mathematician named Hall
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(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Favorite This! Linus pissed his kennel, to be sure
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Linus pissed his kennel, to be sure,
At least he missed most of his fur.
I’m cranky, I tire
Heavily I respire
I’ll croak if much more I endure.
Favorite This! There once was a boy named Clayton
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a boy named Clayton;
Who believed he was king of the nation.
In his bedroom he had
What was needed by Dad
Because teamwork he seemed to be hatin’.
Favorite This! Carshaltan
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...The was a young lass from Carshaltan
Who had a long tit and a short ‘un
But to make up for that
She had a fuckin’ great twat
And a fart like an 850 Norton
Favorite This! Brigadier Fotheringay
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Brigadier Fotheringay
Had a permanent trouser affray,
And his aim when he fired
Was so rarely admired
For his shooting went often astray.
Favorite This! Engineer dave
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was an engineer named Gene
Who invented a sex machine
Concave – convex it take either sex
but oh what a baster to clean
Favorite This! Gershwin enjoyed the caress
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Gershwin enjoyed the caress
Of the cows that he kept and I guess
Out of all of the herd
Which he screwed he preferred
To be stuffing his porky in Bess.
Favorite This! A randy young girl with no hair
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...A randy young girl with no hair
Promised bliss if I shaved myself bare;
But my scrotum is wrinkly
And awfully crinkly;
The hell I can shave myself there.
Favorite This! Jay and Butch
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Butch was a girlfriend of Jays
She knew how to please him by days
but at night he grew cold
so his own dick he would hold
and Jay would beat off in the hay
Favorite This! There was a young fellow called Lloyd
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young fellow called Lloyd
Who was frequently under-employed
At his regular job
So he polished his knob
Making customers very annoyed.
Favorite This! Poor Gregory can’t get his pole
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Poor Gregory can’t get his pole
Up his girl for a tumble and roll
For he has a square peg,
And his paramour Meg
Has a perfectly circular hole.
Favorite This! Man named dave
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once man name Dave
That kept a dead whore in his cave
She stunk
and she stank
and oh so rank
but look at the money Dave saved
Favorite This! Three of mine
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a woman from china
who had a magnificent vagina
so sweet, never sour
the thing had the power
to make men the dinner, and the diner
There once was a bitch on the streets
who said I don’t like to eat
so if I down an ounce more
as a twenty buck whore
it’s protein without all the meat
As a girl I thought it was funny
to dress up as a playboy bunny
my dad was perplexed
that I knew about sex
hence his jackoffs were no longer sunny
Favorite This! Vidi a young Latin lass
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Vidi a young Latin lass
And vici her heart and her ass.
She fondled genteely
My membrum virile
But veni too quickly alas.
Favorite This! girl from philly
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a girl from philly
Whos name was unfortunately billy
When naked she appeared
Living up to her name the boys feared
they’d get banged by her 12 inch willie
Favorite This! A mezzo-soprano called Pat
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...A mezzo-soprano called Pat
Said, “I can’t sing soprano like that.”
Until one day she sat on
The end of my baton
And climaxed in upper A flat.
Favorite This! And Sheilas who wanted some fun
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...And Sheilas who wanted some fun
With a didgeridoo in the sun
Just visited Blue
For a minute or two
Or until they were didgeridone
Favorite This! Remember that Little Miss Muffet
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Remember that Little Miss Muffet
The one with the tits and the tuffet?
I gave her my largest
Havana cigar just
To see if she’d puff it or stuff it.
Favorite This! GIRL FROM PHILLY
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a girl from philly
Whos name was unfortunately billy
When naked she appeared
Living up to her name: boys feared
they would get banged by her 12 inch willy
Favorite This! Hot seat
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a woman unnamed,
Whose sphincter was sore and inflammed,
With one application,
of “H” preparation,
Her personal problem was tamed!
Favorite This! Disgusting, perverted, obscene
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Disgusting, perverted, obscene;
Quite unsavoury, know what I mean?
These are lines about screwings,
Unnatural doings
Activities rude and unclean.
Favorite This! A hooker named sue
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a hooker named Sue,
Who filled her vagina with glue,
As she said with a grin,
If they’ll pay to get in,
Then they’ll pay to get out of it too!
Favorite This! There once was a dog named Linus
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a dog named Linus;
He was a yippy thing – no shyness.
His kennel he wet
And started to fret
And woke me up with a pain in my sinus.
Favorite This! Deluth
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...A cheerful young Dyke from Deluth,
luckily lost her front tooth.
The space would provide,
an erect clit to hide
bringing pleasure without being uncouth
Favorite This! There was a young man from Savannah
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young man from Savannah,
Who met his end in a curious manner.
He whittled a hole
In a telephone pole
And electrified his banana.
Favorite This! Wenatch
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a girl from Wenatch
Who diddled herself with a match
When she got excited
The match it ignited
And burned all the hair off her snatch
Favorite This! An agreeable girl named Miss Doves
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...An agreeable girl named Miss Doves,
Likes to jack off the young men she loves,
She will use her bare fist,
If the fellows insist,
But she really prefers to wear gloves.
Favorite This! Said a swinging young lady named Lyth
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Said a swinging young lady named Lyth,
Whose virtue was largely a myth,
“Try as hard as I can,
I can’t find a man,
That it’s fun to be virtuous with.”
Favorite This! There was a young man…
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young man from Oatley,
Who was wont to charge a fee.
With such a large organ
Admired by young Morgan –
He at once stripped off for free!
Favorite This! They all had a friend, name of Lee
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...They all had a friend, name of Lee,
Whose pecker hung down to his knee,
If he hadn’t a’ tied it,
The girls they’d all ride it,
And he never could use it to pee.
Favorite This! Gay male dirty limerick
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young man from Oatley,
Who was wont to charge a fee.
With such a large organ
Admired by young Morgan –
He at once stripped off for free!
Favorite This! His other young brother, named Saul
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...His other young brother, named Saul,
Was able to bounce either ball,
He could stretch them and snap them,
And juggle and clap them,
Which earned him the plaudits of all.
Favorite This! His brother, a bastard named Ben
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...His brother, a bastard named Ben,
Could rotate his pecker, and then
He would shoot through his rear,
Which made him the dear
Of the girls, and the envy of men.
Favorite This! There was a young fellow named Biddle
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young fellow named Biddle,
Was seldom hard up for a diddle,
For according to rumor,
His tool had a tumor,
And a fine row of warts down the middle.
Favorite This! there was a young woman
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...there was a young woman from wharton street
her pussy was fat and juicy and sweet
so she opened her leg wide
for me to get inside
only then did she feel complete
Favorite This! There was a young lady from China
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young lady from China,
Who had an enormous vagina,
And when she was dead,
They painted it red,
And used it for docking a liner.
Favorite This! 4032!
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...there once was a girl from Peru
who had nothing much better to do
so she sat on the stairs
and counted cunt hairs
four thousand three hundred two!
Favorite This! There once was a man with a member
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a man with a member,
That would only stand up in December,
He said, “It’s too cold,
For a hard-on so bold,
I wish it would work in September!”
Favorite This! I know a young blonde lass called Flossy
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...I know a young blonde lass called Flossy
Who some say is remarkably Saucy
Once, on meetin’ John Wayne
Says she “Hey – I’m for layin'”
“How ’bout you – and the rest of your posse!”
Favorite This! Those crazy Peruvian women…
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a girl from Peru
who had nothing much better to do
so she sat on the stairs
and counted cunt hairs
four thousand three hundred two
Favorite This! A virgin with eyes that were blue
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...A virgin with eyes that were blue,
Was told that it’s sinful to screw.
So she rubbed on her clit,
But swore that she’d quit,
At least in the next year or two.
Favorite This! There was a young lady named Mandel
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young lady named Mandel
Who caused quite a neighborhood scandal
By coming out bare
On the main village square
And massaging herself with a candle.
Favorite This! There was a young woman named Croft
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young woman named Croft
Who played with herself in a loft,
Having reasoned that candles
Could never cause scandals,
Besides which they never went soft.
Favorite This! Contravening the guidelines on health
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Contravening the guidelines on health,
Butcher George likes exposing himself,
But he hides it away
In the sausage display
When young ladies come up to the shelf.
Favorite This! Said a woman with open delight
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...Said a woman with open delight,
“My pubic hair’s perfectly white.
I admit there’s a glare,
But the fellows don’t care.
They locate it more quickly at night.”
Favorite This! There once was an odious brute
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was an odious brute
Who made love in his Sunday-best suit.
The result, as you’d guess,
Was a wet, sticky mess,
And a very chaifed maiden to boot.
Favorite This! There was an old fellow named Paul
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was an old fellow named Paul
Whose prick was exceedingly small
When in bed with a lay
He could screw her all day
Without touching the vaginal wall.
Favorite This! There once was a man from Pompei
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a man from Pompei
Who fashioned a snatch out of clay
The heat from his prick,
Turned the clay into brick
And tore all his foreskin away!!
Favorite This! There was a young girl who begat
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There was a young girl who begat
Three brats, by name Nat, Pat, and Tat.
It was fun in the breeding,
But hell in the feeding
When she found she had no tit for Tat.
Favorite This! There once was a pirate named Bates
(No Ratings Yet)Loading...There once was a pirate named Bates
Who attempted to rhumba on skates.
He fell on his cutlass
Which rendered him nutless
And practically useless on dates.
Favorite This! 